In 1990, I stood looking through the bookshelf at Southern Sisters, a women’s bookstore in Durham, NC. It was located in an older two-story house near the original Durham Bulls baseball stadium. Holly Near was playing in the background and there were a couple of women in the kitchen that was in the back. I was 22 years old and desperately looking for a book that would tell my story, or at least help me make some sense of my story thus far. I could find pieces of my story but not all of it in one place. And at the time, I couldn’t even read some of those pieces without needing to go drink, drug, or hurt myself afterward. The fact that I never found my story is one reason I decided to write this book.
(c) 2026 Terri Phoenix
Thus begins my memoir which has now had four complete revisions working with a professional editor. I’m at the place where I’ve filed for copyright and am researching agents and publishers. I know there is still a long way to go but to get to this point is exhilarating.
The book chronicles my experiences of childhood abuse of multiple kinds by multiple people over the course of fourteen years. I ended up on probation and in foster care my junior year in high school. But with the help of my coach and his wife and their oldest daughter, Jody, I managed to graduate and attend college on a scholarship.
I’ve written here before about the groundbreaking study that described Adverse Childhood Experiences and their long term effects. What the research since that time has demonstrated is that there are things that mitigate to some greater or lesser extent the negative impacts of such experiences.
My story is a testament to the accuracy of that research and is a tribute to the many people who help me survive and thrive. There are harrowing stories but also hysterical ones along the way to where the book concludes. Stay tuned here to learn more about the progress.
